Well, today was crazy. I lost it for the first time since we said goodbye. I began to cry, I felt horrible. The crying was honestly a physical pain. I wanted to talk to my husband, or have him comfort me and knowing that it'll be so long before he can do that again, caused me to panic. I just sobbed, for a long time. When I finally relaxed, I was angry that I had lost control. It was just horrible feeling so miserable. I've been keeping my chin up and keeping tough, so losing it was double crappy! But, again, I'm sorry but I've been waiting til late-late at night to write and I am exhausted. I'm about to grab a shower and do some cleaning - I'm having people over for dinner tomorrow and my parents will be visiting for the weekend. But lets just say, today I hit rock bottom... I just wanted to be with my husband and I wanted him to comfort me. But this is my time I suppose to comfort myself. I gotta keep tough and just keep keepin' on!!
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