Day 40 I didn't sleep the previous night. I laid down in bed around 1am and continued laying there until about 9am when I finally decided to get up and work out. I had an eye appointment, then did a little shopping with a friend. After that we headed to a party with another friend. It always cheers me up being around a large group of people who are in happy mindsets! Even if none of them are talking to me! This is the just of Day 40. Not too much happened besides spending time with friends.
Day 41 My husband's birthday!!!!! I wish so much I could have spent the day with him!!! He is officially 20 years old. This is the second year in a row I've been unable to spend his birthday with him due to him being out to sea :( But one thing I always remind myself, it'll make homecoming so much better. Because after I jump into his arms, and things settle down a bit for the day, we will have many many holidays to make up for! For his birthday, my friend and I went down to the beach. We laid a blanket out on the beach and relaxed for the day. It was about as close as I could get to my husband. When I put my toes in the water, I realized... In that moment, we're sharing the same ocean. The ocean surrounding him is the same ocean that my toes are in. I've finally reached the point where I feel as though I've got a schedule. I've got the ability to be independant, and with that comes a bit of worry and relief. I worry because I wonder what it'll be like for him to come home again. I wonder if I'll immediately grow dependant on him as I was before, and I always worry that I'll stay too independant and it will harm our relationship. Although, in the back of my head, I think to myself... When I see his face, it won't matter. I'll love him and hold him and we'll go back to normal eventually. I'm sure he's going through the same thing as me, just in different places. I am so anxious for the fall time of year to come so he can be back in our home, living everyday with me!
^^How I celebrated my hubby's birthday with him^^
^^ Celebrating my hubby's birthday via skype a few weeks ago ^^
